The Necessity of a Broken Spirit - Psalm 51

When I was praying through Psalm 51 earlier this week, the line that continued to stick with me was "The sacrifice acceptable to God is a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart."  In Esto, we frequently discuss our most prominent flaws as men (especially pride) that continue to lead us to sin.  This line struck me, because in essence, I feel that this proposes why we sin; we are not broken spirits.  

To have a broken spirit acceptable to God calls us to 'break' our pride, selfishness, and worldly longings in order to truly embrace God in our lives.  What prevents us from breaking these flaws?  Subconsciously, I tend to fear the prospect that only such a seemingly intangible entity can deliver me the fulfillment I long for.  As a result, in moments of insecurity, anxiety, and uncertainty, I sometimes flee to the things in life that have given me momentary emotional or sensory pleasure, because that fleeting gratification which I perceive to control, appears to be the best I can hope for from that moment.  All the while, an ever present emptiness in my heart suggests otherwise.

I seek these momentary pleasures or worldly indulgences, and realize, the root of that decision is relying on myself and the world for fulfillment instead of God.  To have this broken spirit is to truly abandon oneself to God; to live every moment looking to him instead of ourselves and the world. As long as I purport to any degree that happiness can be derived from my accomplishments or the world, will I not be a slave to sin?